Monday, September 29, 2008

Officially worst blogger ever.

It's true. I am a terrible blogger. I wish that I could make up for my lack of dedication towards this particular blog, but I cannot make up for lost time. Therefore, I will press on and continue writing as if I have not skipped a beat!

Today is September 29. Can you believe it? In around two months it will be Thanksgiving! The first half to my junior year of college is slowly coming towards the end. My, how life flies! This semester has been a whirlwind of change -- good change. I have a new job at the Apple store, I am in two book clubs that deal with deeper spiritual issues (fantastic), and I really enjoy all of my classes. Yes, things are looking up for the girl who has never taken pride in academics. :)

How shall I make up for lost time? I'll give you a quick overview of this summer: counseled at two camps (in Nebraska and Colorado), worked a whole lot, visited New York, went to Marble Falls with the family, and got to spend quality time with my friends. Overall, it was a fantastic summer. Now that school is in full force, I feel that I have lost that spontaneous side to me. I no longer can get up and go take a quick roadtrip to Dallas or Ft. Worth for winter wardrobe shopping, I now must consult my planner and make sure that I have everything in order. I am guessing that I should get used to this way of life, it will only become harder as I become older.

Okay, enough with Debbie Downer -- Jesus is working in my life, once again! He never stops, does he? It really is quite incredible. Just when I begin to think "Okay, I think that He is done with me, what else is there for me to possibly learn?", He hits me with a new set of "issues" that I must go to Him for. My pride is the devil, I am sure of this. I am currently reading two books: "Celebration of Discipline" by Richard Foster and "Messy Spirituality" by Mike Yaconelli. "Celebration" is dealing with the spiritual disciplines and taking your walk with Christ to a whole new level; experiencing meditation the way it was intended, fasting for all of the right reasons, and reading His word with a new outlook. Fascinating book, go read it! "Messy" is dealing with grace and the beauty of His love for us, despite our imperfections. This book is really talking to me right now, I believe that Yaconelli grew up dealing with similar struggles that I deal with -- refreshing.

Growing up, I would look at my ambitious little sister and admire her for her goals and her aspirations. I would often wonder "Why can't I become driven like that? I am just as smart as her, right?". I was never quite able to pinpoint why my thinking was different than hers until recently: I do not desire to make very many goals because I don't want to end up letting myself down. This kind of thinking is NOT one that I wish that I had. Since when did I ever think that I was unable to achieve different goals that I had set for myself? Now that I see this reoccurring sin creep into every facet of my life, I must trust in the Lord for my strength, instead of fighting it with my own shallow willpower. Everyone has their burden that they must bear before they shed their earthly bodies, mine shall be that (among many other petty burdens that need not be mentioned).

Life truly is one incredible adventure. A quest that really never ends until you come face to face with the Creator. Thank goodness He has shown His care for us, because without it, we would all be one big mess.

Zechariah 3:1-5
"Then he showed me Joshua, the high priest standing before the angel of the Lord, and Satan standing at His right hand to accuse him. And the Lord said to Satan, "The Lord rebuke you, O Satan! The Lord who has chosen Jerusalem rebuke you! Is not this a brand plucked from the fire?" Now Joshua was standing before the angel, clothed with filthy garments. And the angel said to those who were standing before him, "Remove the filthy garments from him." And to him he said, "Behold I have taken your iniquity away from you, and I will clothe you with pure vestments.""